We Love You Nannie!

 This Wednesday morning started off like any other. I posted my wordless post and called my grandparents next door to see how their morning was going. Here lately we have gone to The Box Car with them for lunch most everyday during the week. We are very close and the boys enjoy it so much. Wednesday I thought would be no different. Sadly, I was very wrong and got one of those you just never know what life will bring reminders. Chris had walked next door to ask what time they wanted to eat. They said they would be ready at 11:30. When my cell phone rang at 11:00 I thought there is no way they got ready that fast. I must be running late or looking at the clock wrong. It was Poppa on the phone..not Nannie as it usually is. His voice seemed frantic..highly unusual for him. He told me to get Chris, he needed help with Linda. I froze bc I almost knew the next words. "I think she's had a stroke" Chris rushed over as I tried my best to keep myself calm so I didn't terrify my little people. I'm not a pro at keeping calm. I probably failed miserably. I'm sorry. I finally got in a frame of mind where I could get some cartoons on for Kal-El once Logan feel asleep and jogged back and forth to check on the extent of things. The ambulance was already on its way. She had just fallen out as she attempted to get ready for our lunch date. When I saw Nannie laying there and actually talking to us with no OBVIOUS intimidate type of stroke indicators ie slurred speech etc I felt only a small sense of relief. The primary reason for that was because I've said for months to anyone that I thought would listen that I thought she was having mini strokes. I wasn't dressed yet and had to get the kids dressed as well so I ran home and got a sheet of paper to write down instructions for Mom, Aunt Vicki, and Aunt Shane. I could hardly write but managed to get ....she needs a cat scan first, if its a clot she has a 3 hr window to get the tPA shot. I'm no leading medical expert but I try to stay as educated on things as I possibly can. My brain literally turns into a sponge when I'm acquiring new knowledge esp when the care of my family is involved so I knew what needed to be done. The approximate time of her stroke was 11:00am. The ticking clock began. She missed a shot in the past with her first stroke 6 years ago so I was determined that she receive the best care possible this time around. Unfortunately, it was worse than ever.
   The ER doctor was horrendous. I won't mention her name because there are now current on going issues. Basically my grandmother laid in an ER bed (with a blood clot on her brain) from noon until 9pm at night. The ER doctor even wanted to send her home. I was in the room when she walked in. This common vial creature was passive and dismissive the moment she walked in. Sorry I know that sounds awfully extreme but I loathe people who are in the medical field that have zero business being there. I read people pretty flawlessly and 1 minute in I knew we were in trouble. She was an idiot. I have zero problems saying it. She took one look at her and said flatly "Oh its probably a urinary tract infection" I rolled my eyes. I absolutely couldn't help it. "It presents this way in the elderly" I didn't buy it for a second. Despite us telling her that this wasn't normal for her and she was very active and in good health at her age. She gets around as good as me some days. She wouldn't budge. We asked her repeatedly for scans. We were denied. She got curt the 3 rd and final time barking that "she doesn't meet the criteria and she hasn't had a stroke" We kept on so hard that the only thing she was willing to do was let her stay over night and try to "fudge so yalls insurance will cover her" Weakness for a UTI is not a reason to keep someone was her exact words to us. M-O-R-O-N. Nannie got her room. At 9:00pm that night the doctor on the floor walked in gave her the simple psychical test that I was very familiar with even before scans were preformed and determined in 5 minutes that she had a stroke. Scans confirmed the findings one hour later. Scans she should of had the first hour of her arrival not 9 hours later. Our window was again closed and she was left to suffer the effects of the aftermath of a stroke. That night she was transferred to CCU. The following morning ECM decided to send her to Birmingham. Thank God.
   Chris, the boys and I got up early ,not that anyone slept, and made our way to Birmingham. I was so anxious to speak to a knowledgeable doctor. Once he arrived he confirmed it was definitely a stroke and told us that she would need sodium thru a central line to try to counter the brain swelling that would occur over he next 5 days. Day 1 being the onset of the stroke. The procedure was not without its own risk...primarily serious staph infection, lung puncture etc. The benefits outweigh the risk because without the procedure if the swelling got extensive enough she could have brain death. The fear of losing her was too great so the decision was made quickly. The doctor let us look at her scans. He showed us the locations of her strokes. Yes with an S. He showed us the big one she had 6 years ago. He said he was blown away she lived thru it let alone walk, talk, and live a normal active life. Wednesday's stroke was on the same side, the left, not as big but still a large stroke. He was very honest about how serious it was...especially the swelling. He told us that we hadn't seen the worst day yet. Maxim swelling peaks day 3-4. The he moved on to show us a couple of others that had taken place over the last 6 months. Small ones. Mini strokes....just as I thought. I just hung my head and cried. I felt like I had the knowledge before hand and didn't do enough. You can't break a doctors arm and force them to run tests and sometimes education isn't enough. It makes defeat that much worse. Its such a helpless feeling. The hardest part for me was that Nannie was so much better yesterday than the day prior when the stroke began. It's such a cruel waiting period. The nature of a stroke altogether seems cruel to me. The first day is horrible bc thats when the lack of blood supply is aparent and you get a taste of the extent of the damage. Then as the clot dissipates its almost like there is a little  hope and waiting to see the degree of brain swelling robs you of that precious hope. All you can do is wait and pray. At least we were doing it with people we love and finally in good hands.
  We made the long drive home last night because Chris had to be called out for work this morning. I debated going back today but I think I'm going to let the boys get a good nights rest and drive down early in the morning  unless there is a change tonight. Even during her most difficult days she and Poppa can only think of others. They are both worried about me driving down alone with the boys. The are precious people. I learned something unexpected about my grandmother thru this so far. I've always thought of her as kind, beautiful, and spoiled by my sweet grandfather who loves her. Feminine and graceful and a very loyal sense of family. I never considered for a moment her enormous strength. I do now. Especially after what the doctor told us about her last stroke. She is obviously a fighter. Nannie, please keep fighting these next few days. You've beat a bigger monster than this already. Tomorrow is my birthday and my only wish is to share a piece of cake with you....We love you Nannie!